Thursday, March 24, 2011
I was 18 when I had Riley. 18. His "DNA doner" was 20. Riley was not a planned pregnancy, but I hate calling him an "accident." It sounds so negative, and Riley is not at all negative. He is the sunshine that fills my day, and the love and happiness that fills my heart. Obviously Riley's father and I weren't married, we never did get married, and he chose to remove himself from the situation shortly after Riley was born.
I'm 21 now and Riley and I are living our lives. Riley continues to impress me every day with his kindness, love for life, and his intelligence. He is a happy little boy with a wonderfully balanced home life. My dad acts as his dad, and Matt chips in too:) Riley has the best male role models any little boy could ask for. He also has the best extended family in my little sister, older step-brother, my mom, my step-dad, Matt's family, and my extended family, especially my grandma.
I am a mom like any other mom out there. I wake up in the morning and make coffee to get through the day. But waking up at the crack ass of dawn is worth it with I see my little nugget-boy smile and say, "Good morning, mommy!" From that moment on it is go, go, go all day until I put him in his bed at night, but it is SO worth it. To see him excel at everything he does elates me. I made him, he is a product of ME.
The only draw-back I see Riley go through is something that I unintentionally put him through. He doesn't have many go-to friends because I have the hardest time connecting with other moms. Yes, I am young, but does that make me any different than you? No. I have a sense of style, a pierced nose, and a tattoo, but does that make me a wild crazy partier? No. I at 20something do the same things that you at 30something do day-to-day. I have the same struggles, same questions, same life as you.
It killed me when I witnessed someone actually remove their child from playing with Riley at a park once after they realized I was his mother and not his nanny. Actually, I can't even tell you how many times I've been asked if I am "the nanny" by different people in public, starting from when Riley was a new-born. This is what you are teaching your children? To not like someone because of their situation? My son is the happiest, most polite, sweet, kind little boy and your kid should be as happy to play with him as he is to play with them.
I mean, come on, I thought we left high school behind, people! Why are you grouping me with a stereotype because of my age? Although I haven't made it to college yet, I am not ignorant. Although I turned 21 shortly after Riley turned 2 does not make me a uncontrollable party-girl. I am doing my best to be a good mother, "home-maker," girlfriend, daughter, sister, and friend and instill in my child respect, love, manners, happiness, and curiosity for life just like you.
So, please, don't group me into a stereotype that I am not. Get to know me for me, and I will do the same for you.
I will leave you with a quote from one of my all-time favorite movies, The Birdcage:
Albert: What? No good? Why? I'm dressed just the way you are. I took off all my rings. I'm not wearing any makeup. I'm just a guy.
Armand: What about those?
Albert: Those? Well, one does want but a hint of color. Oh, I see, you're thinking that dressed this way, I'm even more obvious, aren't you? You're right. I just wanted so much to help you. And you hate me, you both hate me.
Albert, I can relate...